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One of our approaches
The Gottman Method
The Gottman Method is a structured, research-based approach for couples. It’s built on decades of research into what helps relationships thrive, and it gives the two of you practical tools for the moments that keep going wrong.
Every couple has the same few fights. What changes is how you handle them.
How it works
The idea behind it
The approach targets specific, well-documented patterns that damage relationships. Research points to four in particular, sometimes called the “Four Horsemen”: criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling (shutting down and going silent). Together we replace these with specific, practiced skills for communication, handling conflict, and connection.
A core idea behind the method is that conflict itself isn’t the problem. Most long-term couples have some version of the same disagreements for years, often about the same handful of topics. What matters is how you handle those moments, and how much positive connection you have outside of conflict to balance it out.
In session
What a session looks like
Work often starts with an assessment. That can include individual sessions with each partner and some structured questions, to map out your relationship’s specific strengths and problem areas, rather than assuming every couple needs the same thing.
From there, sessions involve specific, structured exercises aimed at whatever’s showing up most for you. This might include guided conversations using particular communication tools to interrupt one of the “Four Horsemen” patterns. Or it might include exercises designed to rebuild “fondness and admiration” if disconnection is the bigger issue. The tools are concrete and practiced together, not just discussed.
Frequently asked questions
Is this covered by insurance?
The approach doesn’t change the coverage. Most extended health plans cover sessions with a Registered Counselling Therapist or Registered Social Worker. Call the number on your benefits card and ask. We bill most major insurers directly, so you only pay what your plan doesn’t cover; otherwise you get a receipt after every session.
How many sessions will it take?
It depends on you and what you’re working on. By session two you’ll have a written plan, and every few sessions we check in with the same short questions so you can see what’s changing. You can stop at any time.
Does it work online?
Yes. We offer every approach in person in Dartmouth and by secure video anywhere in Nova Scotia. If one of them works better in person, we’ll tell you.
Does it cost more?
No. Whichever approach we use, it’s included in your standard session fee. See fees and insurance.
Ready when you are.
You don’t need to choose an approach before you book. That’s our job, together with you, in the first two sessions.